What's It Worth

Does anyone remember the Martin Lawrence and Danny Devito movie What's the Worst That Could Happen? In the movie Martin plays a thief who, while in the process of a burglary, is busted by the home owner played by Danny. As the police have Martin cuffed and ready to haul off, Danny lies and tells the cops that the ring Martin is wearing is his. Thus ensues a cat and mouse chase so that Martin can get back the ring. If by now you are judging my choice in movie selection just know I bought the DVD when Martin was hot and I wanted to watch something silly this weekend.

In a scene in which Martin is trying to explain the definition of value to his girlfriend, who had given him the ring, and why he was fighting so hard to get it back he describes worth as nothing more than a man made valuation of something. He held a Faberge egg up and told her that some people thought it's value to be pretty significant, but he on the other hand didn't think much of it. In fact, he threw the egg in the trash. The ring on the other hand was priceless to him. Last week in church, my pastor described value as simply the price you are willing to pay for a thing. Isn't that so true?

I'm now ruminating on the values I've placed on things in life. In a conversation this afternoon with the Bronx Bomber, I told her how I had some time ago come to the conclusion that my life didn't accurately reflect my interests. However, I failed to see that in that same way, it didn't reflect the things that I truly valued either. In his sermon, my pastor also stated that if you were hesitant to pay the price for something then, it was just a preference. Deep thought has revealed this to be pure unfiltered truth!

Here are a few such examples of where I've previously missed the mark in valuation in my life:

1. Dating: Back to the standards conversation from spring, I've always told myself I valued myself high enough to not let someone treat me less than what I know I am worth. Yet time and again, my standards weren't always solid and I accepted less than my asking price. Mentally, I told myself I was worth complete adoration, respect, and consideration. I didn't all the time get that and I didn't, for the most part, demand it. I left the suitor believing that his assessment of my worth was accurate when it couldn't have been further from the truth.
   
2. Family and Friendships: I believe these two sets of people are priceless. There is untold wealth in having a family that nurtures, loves, and supports you from the beginning as well as friends who love you enough to overlook your character quirks and still choose to be in community with you (unlike family, friends have every right to pack their camel and go if the relationship seems like too much work). And here I am going home so infrequently that I'm always nervous that the Tot is going to forget what I look like. It would probably help if my hair wasn't different each time she saw me. Although I try to stay in touch with people as much as possible, I hadn't consistently lived up to that. The Stormy One literally works a 5 minute walk from my office and yet she and I see each other only about once every other month. Ms. Scorsese lives 3 blocks from my apartment and I see her once a quarter, if that frequently. This is unacceptable. I understand people's schedules are tight these days and everyone has their own concerns, but I know I can step it up with my contact. I do a good job of staying in touch. I'm aiming for doing a great job!
3. Health: I've always enjoyed being physical. I believe that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. I want to grow older fabulously. Then why aren't I exercising daily or on a consistent weekly basis? I do try to hit the track but I go through spurts where I'm there for 2 months and off for 3 months. This is unacceptable. I have to keep my body active and well in order to take care of this temple I've been entrusted with. Long life and good health are just as priceless as the relationships with loved ones. How important is it to me to have a body that doesn't need Spanx? I tell myself it's very important, right up there with maintain all my teeth, but I'm not diligent about what I eat or how much I exercise. This is no longer acceptable either.

These are just a few examples of my life not reflecting where I place the highest value. Our mental perceptions of how we see ourselves unfortunately don't always line up with the reality of who we actually are. The list could've gone on to include certain hobbies that I'm extremely interested in like knitting (get all your giggles out now but you'll be sorry once I have fly sweaters and you don't), comedy, home improvement projects (I'm aware that I need to own a home first), etc. What are some of the things in your life where you thought you placed a high value and discovered it was only a preference. Don't leave me out on a limb because I know I'm not the only one!